The Law of Attraction and Building New Relationships

While it's undeniable that being in a loving relationship can be incredibly fulfilling and full of positives, it's also undeniable that finding relationships like that can be difficult. We've all experienced the defeated and heartbreaking feeling of rejection or an otherwise failed relationship, and most would agree the risks of these unpleasant experiences are worth it if it means finding real love and joyous fulfillment. That said, it's this end point that it can take an entire lifetime for some of us to reach.

While some might claim that finding love boils down to fate and being in the right place at the right time, others would argue that we exercise some control over what – and whom – we attract into our lives. If you're in the second camp like I am, you understand that your thoughts and actions determine your fate. Whether you call it the Law of Attraction or fate or something else, these are the factors at work in finding fulfilling relationships.

Attracting Fulfilling Relationships

It's likely you were drawn to this article either because you're dissatisfied with the state of your current relationship or because you experienced a significant heartbreak in the past. Regardless of from which perspective you’re coming, the first thing you'll have to do is wipe your slate clean in order to attract into your life the love you deserve. It doesn't take a relationship expert to realize that dwelling on past betrayal and hurt isn't helpful but instead makes it more difficult for you to move on to something positive. Comparing potential romantic interests with a past lover simply brings the past into the present and prevents you from exploring the potential of new relationships.

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Perfect Moment Monday: Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder

My Perfect Moment for this week …

…was having my husband arrive home safe and sound from a 10-day business trip.

I consider myself fortunate, as he could be traveling a lot more than he has been. As safe as traveling is these days, when his flight is delayed or canceled due to airplane issues I can’t help but get butterflies in my stomach. So when he arrived safely Friday evening—albeit seven hours late—both my son and I couldn’t have been happier.

Today is Valentine’s Day. Well, I got the best valentine a few days early…

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Breast Cancer: One Degree of Separation

I sat down to write a blog about breast cancer, not really sure why since I know so many people who are first-hand experts and I am fortunate enough to be at arm’s length and hold an inexperienced and innocent view. I truly believe there is not one thing that happens on this earth that there is not a higher reason to support the experience, but when it comes to the C word I often wonder what in God’s name is a good enough or high enough reason for anyone to experience cancer. And then I always pose the question, “Isn’t there another way to learn the same lesson or experience the same emotional learning opportunity?”

My very first experience with breast cancer came just two months after moving to California from Vancouver, British Columbia. One of my closest friends, Roberta (Bobbi) Stackhouse, called me with the news she had found a lump while in the shower. I was 28, she was 34, and it was September 1997. When we hung up the phone I cried: not because I felt bad, but because I had not one clue about breast cancer or what she might have to go through in the coming months. From my perspective, my fears of being of “uneducated” and “ignorant” had come true.

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Divorced Parents: Friends?

I would dare to guess there isn’t a child of any age who holds the dream of his parents remaining together their entire lives. I consider myself very fortunate to have witnessed a parental marriage now lasting close to 45 years and am proud to say it doesn’t seem to have an end in sight. I also am aware of my good fortune and that there are many my age as well as older and younger who have gone through the experience of parents divorcing. At this juncture there is a percentage that holds the dream of their parents at least remaining friends, thus allowing holidays and other special events to be more amicable and pleasant. Staying friends after a divorce may be difficult, but a lot of parents try to maintain a relationship with their ex-spouses because of their children. The important question, however, is whether it is healthy for divorced parents to be friends.

In all honesty, this question can’t be answered with a simple yes or no; it all depends on the situation in which the two people find themselves and their emotional health. First let’s define friendship. In this instance we’ll refer to friendship as two individuals who can share a common space physically, emotionally and energetically while being supportive of the other individual’s personal choices and decisions. This friendship is not an intimate exchange but a human exchange. Ideally, it would be wise for divorced parents to become aware of where they are and work on improving some of the following areas (Note: this is only a partial list.) to successfully embrace and maintain a friendship.

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Emotional Cheating

When we hear the word “cheating” in reference to a relationship, we often don’t even consider anything outside of a physical interaction. But emotional cheating can be as damaging to a relationship as infidelity. The problem, however, is that unlike infidelity, emotional cheating isn’t easy to catch, prove or even admit! Very often most people are not even aware of the fact they are cheating on their partner emotionally.

Emotional cheating usually starts when one develops an emotional bond with a person of the opposite sex and starts sharing more with that person than with his or her partner. These relationships may or may not lead to physical intimacy, but in either of the two cases the existing relationship of the cheater suffers.

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Fear of Intimacy

During our lives we journey through many different experiences: some good and some not so much. All these experiences impact how we interpret or receive attention from other individuals. This can be heightened when we begin to have a closer relationship with another person. A friendship flourishes into a romantic partnership and takes the leap of unbridled love for a life commitment. But what happens if the “not so good” interactions have impacted greater than we once thought? When we begin to notice pulling away from another when romantic affection is offered or reduce our availability to receiving this type of love, then we need to ask ourselves why these deeply rooted hurts or traumas actually created the situation we’ve heard of and know of as a “Fear of Intimacy.”

In addition to the experiences, if a recognizable personality trait within us is a lack of self-confidence and low self-worth, then these can be considered important contributing factors, thus increasing this fear.

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Law of Attraction: Love and Happiness

The law of attraction states that every positive or negative event that happened in your life was attracted by you. Another way of saying this would be that thoughts influence chance. The Law of Attraction argues that "if you really want something and truly believe it's possible, you'll get it."

This thought really is at the heart of Paulo Coelho’s now-famous book The Alchemist. His famous lines have been repeated in several movies, books and seminars: “If you want something badly enough to make it your destiny, the entire universe will conspire to let you have it.”

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The Purpose of Life

Man has forever sought answer to this question: What, after all, is the purpose of human life? Why have we been put in this world? Seers and gurus have been contemplating this eternal question for centuries, and the one thing that is perhaps common to all their teachings is the belief that the purpose of life is the attainment of peace; that is, such peace that does not suffer from the fear of change.

The next logical question that comes to mind after hearing this is, “How can one attain everlasting peace?” This can happen only after a thorough investigation is made concerning the nature of the body and the life force that is within it. But really, who has unlimited time to contemplate the meaning and purpose of life? The short cut is to delve into the most current “greatest” and “best” self-help book on the top seller list and hope for the best. Or even shorter is to assume our “peace” comes through our worldly possessions.

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When the Love Is Gone

Here is guest blogger Jackie Nees' from Integrity Office Solutions newest posting. Enjoy!

I was flipping through a magazine recently when the title of an article caught my eye. It said, “Do You Love Your Business?” My initial thought was, what a silly question, who doesn’t love their business? Then I realized that number is probably much higher than I think!

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