Emotional Crisis? Emotional Infidelity

When we hear the expression "infidelity" in reference to a relationship, we frequently don't even think about anything outside of a physical interaction. But emotional cheating can be as damaging to a relationship as unfaithfulness. The difficulty, though, is that unlike infidelity, emotional infidelity isn't simple to catch, confirm or even admit! Very often the majority of people aren't even conscious of the fact that they are cheating on their partner emotionally.

Emotional cheating typically starts when one develops an emotional bond with a person of the opposite sex and begins sharing more with that person then with his or her partner. These relationships may or may not lead to physical intimacy; in either of the two cases, the existing relationship of the cheater suffers.

In the majority of cases, emotional cheating begins as an innocent friendship but develops into a "more than friends" relationship without the physical intimacy. It therefore results in being simple for people to convince themselves and others that they only share a special friendship and nothing else. A person might even equate it to the sharing of information or time with that of two best friends.

With the age of technology and the ease of "meeting" new people and connecting with "old friends," it's easy to figure how sometimes people develop meaningful emotional bonds with their online acquaintances. It's this kind of emotional infidelity that's even more difficult to identify and admit. The clandestine nature of these relationships, along with the benefit of mystery the World Wide Web provides, makes the dynamic of emotional infidelity even more complex.

So how do you know whether you're cheating on your companion emotionally? The following are a few of the biggest tell-tale signs:

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What’s Your Edge?

For all those who strive to be successful in their professional lives, whether they work for a corporation or they are an entrepreneur, there are a few things they (or should I say you) definitely need to have in order to achieve and keep their edge.

Having a vision is critical to being able to climb the corporate ladder. Your vision is what will allow you to stay motivated while working toward achieving the goals you've set for yourself. Goal-setting isn't always easy, as there is an art behind it that involves knowing how to set realistic and achievable goals while also managing your time and energy as you spend time completing the necessary actions to meet your milestones along the way that ultimately lead you right into the hands of success.

Knowing your vision and taking action to make it a reality takes more than just yourself. You need a support network that will act not just as cheerleaders to help keep you motivated but also to be the "naysayers" and play devil’s advocate. These elements, when combined, create a recipe for success. In order for you to earn the promotion to the next rung, you need something we call respect. Respect is a two-way street. Not only do you need to hold respect for those to whom you report, but those who report to you and those on the same level must do the same.

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The Law of Attraction and Building New Relationships

While it's undeniable that being in a loving relationship can be incredibly fulfilling and full of positives, it's also undeniable that finding relationships like that can be difficult. We've all experienced the defeated and heartbreaking feeling of rejection or an otherwise failed relationship, and most would agree the risks of these unpleasant experiences are worth it if it means finding real love and joyous fulfillment. That said, it's this end point that it can take an entire lifetime for some of us to reach.

While some might claim that finding love boils down to fate and being in the right place at the right time, others would argue that we exercise some control over what – and whom – we attract into our lives. If you're in the second camp like I am, you understand that your thoughts and actions determine your fate. Whether you call it the Law of Attraction or fate or something else, these are the factors at work in finding fulfilling relationships.

Attracting Fulfilling Relationships

It's likely you were drawn to this article either because you're dissatisfied with the state of your current relationship or because you experienced a significant heartbreak in the past. Regardless of from which perspective you’re coming, the first thing you'll have to do is wipe your slate clean in order to attract into your life the love you deserve. It doesn't take a relationship expert to realize that dwelling on past betrayal and hurt isn't helpful but instead makes it more difficult for you to move on to something positive. Comparing potential romantic interests with a past lover simply brings the past into the present and prevents you from exploring the potential of new relationships.

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Breast Cancer: One Degree of Separation

I sat down to write a blog about breast cancer, not really sure why since I know so many people who are first-hand experts and I am fortunate enough to be at arm’s length and hold an inexperienced and innocent view. I truly believe there is not one thing that happens on this earth that there is not a higher reason to support the experience, but when it comes to the C word I often wonder what in God’s name is a good enough or high enough reason for anyone to experience cancer. And then I always pose the question, “Isn’t there another way to learn the same lesson or experience the same emotional learning opportunity?”

My very first experience with breast cancer came just two months after moving to California from Vancouver, British Columbia. One of my closest friends, Roberta (Bobbi) Stackhouse, called me with the news she had found a lump while in the shower. I was 28, she was 34, and it was September 1997. When we hung up the phone I cried: not because I felt bad, but because I had not one clue about breast cancer or what she might have to go through in the coming months. From my perspective, my fears of being of “uneducated” and “ignorant” had come true.

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Divorced Parents: Friends?

I would dare to guess there isn’t a child of any age who holds the dream of his parents remaining together their entire lives. I consider myself very fortunate to have witnessed a parental marriage now lasting close to 45 years and am proud to say it doesn’t seem to have an end in sight. I also am aware of my good fortune and that there are many my age as well as older and younger who have gone through the experience of parents divorcing. At this juncture there is a percentage that holds the dream of their parents at least remaining friends, thus allowing holidays and other special events to be more amicable and pleasant. Staying friends after a divorce may be difficult, but a lot of parents try to maintain a relationship with their ex-spouses because of their children. The important question, however, is whether it is healthy for divorced parents to be friends.

In all honesty, this question can’t be answered with a simple yes or no; it all depends on the situation in which the two people find themselves and their emotional health. First let’s define friendship. In this instance we’ll refer to friendship as two individuals who can share a common space physically, emotionally and energetically while being supportive of the other individual’s personal choices and decisions. This friendship is not an intimate exchange but a human exchange. Ideally, it would be wise for divorced parents to become aware of where they are and work on improving some of the following areas (Note: this is only a partial list.) to successfully embrace and maintain a friendship.

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Emotional Cheating

When we hear the word “cheating” in reference to a relationship, we often don’t even consider anything outside of a physical interaction. But emotional cheating can be as damaging to a relationship as infidelity. The problem, however, is that unlike infidelity, emotional cheating isn’t easy to catch, prove or even admit! Very often most people are not even aware of the fact they are cheating on their partner emotionally.

Emotional cheating usually starts when one develops an emotional bond with a person of the opposite sex and starts sharing more with that person than with his or her partner. These relationships may or may not lead to physical intimacy, but in either of the two cases the existing relationship of the cheater suffers.

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Difficult People at Work?

Whether we like it or not, all those working in an office setting have to deal with office politics and difficult people at work. After all, we can’t always choose with whom we work, so we just need to find a way to co-exist with people we don’t like or with whom we can’t get along. The vital question is, “How can one do that?” So, here are some tips that can help you find the right answer.

Introspect
I know it doesn’t sound like the best piece of advice. After all, we’re supposed to discuss how to handle people whom you have already acknowledged as difficult, right? But the fact is that often it is our own reaction to people who are different from us that makes us see them as “difficult.” It is therefore important we examine our own reactions and behavior objectively to figure out if at all we are the ones who are overeating.

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Client Management: When to Fire Clients

As a consultant you want both money and work satisfaction, right? You’ll get these two vital things only if you have the right clients. So, what do I mean by the “right clients,” you may ask? The answer: your clients should respect you, value your services and pay you well. As a small business owner you do not go into business for yourself with the risk and investment to lose money or just break even. You go into business to make money. Part of the responsibility of working for yourself is about knowing your limits and your area of expertise. When you don’t honor these elements, you run the risk of losing more than you could be gaining.

Several consultants have a huge client base, but their earnings really come from 20-25% of them because a lot of people try to squeeze as much as they can out of consultants without paying them what they deserve. Then again, there are also clients who treat consultants like commodities or mere trainers. While such clients may pay you well, at the end of the day people who don’t value your services are not good for your overall brand image. This is one of the many reasons you need to be able to truly identify your key target demographic and/or perfect client type.

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Using Credit Cards?

Do you find yourself stuck in a vicious cycle of debt and spending? Do you start the month with paying your debts and end up living off your credit card as the month’s end approaches? Is the word “savings” nothing but a wistful dream for you? If yes, then you need to stop using your credit card right away!

Sound extreme? Absolutely! Sound overwhelming? Correct again!

Cutting yourself off from using your credit card in one fell swoop may be difficult for some to embrace, but the root of the difficulty may not actually be the credit card itself but rather what the credit card represents for you. If you are dependent on a credit card, then take a look in other areas of your life wherein you are dependent upon someone else that perhaps isn’t a healthy dependency…

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Animals and Dreams

As a third segment in our dream blogs sequence, we want to focus on animals and how they impact our dreams as well as their possible interpretations. Animals play a large role in our lives. Whether they are pets or visit us from the wild, seeing animals in our dreams is nothing unusual; in fact, almost all of us have animal dreams at some point or the other. While some dreams focus on a single animal, there are others in which animals make a sort of “guest appearance.” Regardless of which animals appear in our dreams, they carry messages. To decode the message you need to remember the animal you saw, what it was doing in your dream and the context of its appearance.

The Animal
Animals in our dreams are actually symbols of the characteristics we associate with them. For instance, the fox generally stands for cunning and stealth, lions for ferocity and bravery, dogs for loyalty and faithfulness, etc.

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